It's so hard.

Its so hard to say i love you & not draw back in tears,
Its so hard to know you're not there to help me face my fears,
Its so hard to know the phones at reach,
But i can't hear your voice.
Its so hard to know that this time breaking up wasn't my choice,
Its so hard to see you happy when im crying deep inside,
Its so hard to just find feelings & now have to make them hide,
Its so hard to live without you when i need you more than words,
To want to scream how much i love you but hold back & not be heard.
Its so hard to go to sleep at night when i can't dream of you,
Its so hard to think you might fall in love with someone new,
Its so hard to not start crying when i hear our songs,
Its so hard to sit & wonder "Where did i go wrong?"
Its so hard to live without you,
If only i would have known,
I will never love another,
I would rather be alone.

Everyone walks away;

You said you're sorry, your face is like an angel. It comes out when you need it too. I honestly cant believe i believed in us. I shoulda known. Im not a princess, this aint a fairytale, im not the one you'll sweep off her feet. I wish i was. I was dreamer before you let me down. maybe i was naive, got lost in your sweetness. I never really had a chance. I didnt know being in love was so hard. I had so many dreams about you & me. Happy endings. I didnt think it was gonna end this way. Sometimes, people change their mind. Never thought you would. But it's killing me to see you gone after all this. I dont know what to be without you around. I know its not simple. Its not easy no ones here to save me from my fears now. I cant breathe without you. I never wanted this. Every bump in the road, i tried to swerve. Nothing i can say is going to save us from this fallout. I hope you know this isnt easy for me. I took a chance, i took a shot. Im not bulletproof. You siad certain things that got me, but i let it go. I felt like i didnt know you at all. You told me you loved me than cut me down. I need you like a heartbeat but you know our history. You told me you wanted me then you pushed me away. Why am i feeling so small? Do you feel whole? You're the only thing in my mind. You let go, is it my turn? All this time ive waited for things to get better all that happens is i get let down. I keep thinking we'll get better but I dont know anymore. I dont wanna hurt anymore. I wanted to love you all my life. You had your share of secrets & now im tired of being the last to know. You had me crawling for you. That woulda never changed. we used to shine so bright but i watched it all fade away. I was so in love i acted insane. thats the way i loved you. Now im breaking down, im coming undone. I cant keep it together anymore. Its a roller coaster rush. & i never knew i could feel that way. You dont see the smile im faking. or how my hearts breaking. You were wild & crazy yet so frustrating, intoxicating & complicated. You got away by mistake & now i miss you. I dont feel welcome in your life anymore. I feel so low. one second it was perfect now you're gone. I think back to when you said forever & always. Was it all a lie? everythings coming down to nothin. now you're gone...cant seem to figure out what i've done to lose you. I wanted to you give you everything. I guess my everything wasnt good enough for you. But i love you though. I always will. DONT ever forget that. You will always have my heart. Forever. & always.